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Who has the right….

…to judge others?  Certainly not me.

The phone call recently about a couple who was being judged by their officiant because it was a second marriage (read into it, “you were divorced”) got me thinking about the right to judge others.

The couple that called asked me to officiate their ceremony.  I said I’d be honored.

I often get judged and I really try not to judge others – I don’t have the right to!

I have been judged on: where I live, that I was/is a yankee, what I drive, yep – my hair is thinning, that I like to go to sleep early,  and so on.  When I was a child I would be judged/made fun of because I  played the clarinet and tuba (not at the same time!)

Recently someone asked me when I got out of my car at a Christian event – with a very judgmental tone (the kind that you’d give a child when you say, “did you spill the milk?”),

“What do you do for a living?  What kind of car do you drive?”

Never in my life have I felt so judged because I drive my nearly seven year old midlife crisis convertible.

If I were to arrive anywhere in a car like this, I would be judged because I drive a car like this.

1978 Ford Pinto


The fact is, I used to own a car just like this! And, it was the first car I owned in my name (well, me and and finance company.) It was purchased used in 1983ish.

So now the world officially knows, I drive a white convertible!

Who has the right to judge others?

Share your thoughts.


2 thoughts on “Who has the right….

  1. When my (now) husband and i decided to get married in Savannah, we reached out to my college Pastor to officiate our ceremony. Knowing that we were both strong Christians, and love the Lord, it never occurred to me that we would be judged for living together before we were married, and ultimately was told we needed to move out before the wedding, or he would not perform the ceremony. That’s when God put you in our lives. You were a true answer to prayer, and made our ceremony more special and authentic than i could ever have wanted. I have never felt more shunned by the beginning of the experience, but also, never more welcomed, and loved at the end. I feel we, as Christians have taken it upon ourselves to judge others for their “sins” when we should be the most inclusive, and least judgmental group of people.

    1. Thank you so much for your kind words. You two are truly remarkable people! I try my best not to judge others, I’ve not walked in their shoes and therefore don’t have to right to judge them. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your wedding day!

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